26.5.11

I woke up feeling ill in the night so I was sort of awake-dreaming that me and my online friend Tami were parking cars next to these blocks, but we couldn't work it out. It was horrible, I felt delirious!

Once I felt better and got back to sleep I dreamt that Royal Mail were issuing commemorative Rik Mayall stamps. Also, I went back to uni on the train, and Amy was there showing me a collection of Rik-autographs she'd managed to collect, of him in different characters.

24.5.11

I won a Comic Relief competition where I got to go live on the show on Red Nose Day and improvise a scene of Bottom with Rik and Ade. It was like a dream come true for me, with the whole nation watching to prove it really happened! I had all my family tuned in on TV - Dad rang everyone afterwards and apparently my Auntie was repulsed by the crude humour but at the same time she found me funny, so she didn't know whether to laugh or punch me in the face. The improvisation itself was hard at first but it ended up going quite well and at the end Rik smiled at me.

23.5.11

I dreamt I got driving again, but because I hadn't done it in quite a while I was terrible at it and kept nearly crashing. I pulled out in front of someone at a roundabout and actually had to reach my hand out to push the other car away.

21.5.11

I dreamt me and my friend Grace were playing Tomb Raider Legend but the game was being narrated by two girls who hated it, so they got really annoying.

I also had a cocaine problem. I didn't realise for ages because I thought the coke I was doing was sherbet, but then my family showed me some photos of me high on it and I believed I had a problem. Giving up was relatively easy, due to the whole "I thought it was sherbet" thing!

19.5.11

I dreamt I was at my uni house but I needed to be in uni by ten o' clock because I was doing a poetry performance for part of my degree. I had to strip as part of this performance but I'm not sure why. In the dream I never made it to the poetry thing because my timing was working on realtime: I was midway between being asleep and awake and I kept checking my clock and using that in the dream. Yes, I'm confused too.

18.5.11

I was at home with some of my uni friends and we were hanging around outside the Co-Op because that was apparently where people hung out. This small truck drove past that was on fire. One of my friends threw an apple at it: the driver got mad, the apple bounced off and my friend caught it, even though it was on fire. He chucked it aside without even being the slightest bit burnt.

14.5.11

I dreamt that because I still have a key for the old house, I was allowed to go back there whenever I wanted.

12.5.11

I dreamt Duran Duran were playing a gig in the garden opposite where I lived. Unfortunately I was really busy packing stuff up to move house so I had to keep and dashing there and back. I was, most of the time, pretty much the only person there. It was nice having them all to myself, but they were visibly not making much of an effort for just me. Especially not Simon. He was singing shit.

10.5.11

I dreamt my laptop had completely broken. The screen had practically split in half down the middle.

8.5.11

I dreamt I was going to get my deposit back on my room at uni so I had to make sure it was all neat and tidy. It turned out I'd doodled loads on the inside of the wardrobe door in permanent marker, so I had to scrub it all off. But even then it left white shadows where it had all been.

Three Reasons

...for my long absence.

1. I moved house and had no Internet in said house for nearly two weeks.

2. I had important exams and all the knowledge I needed for them fell out of my head.

3. Blogger didn't work when I finally did try to update it.

Sorry mates! Here come the dreams.

4.5.11

I dreamt I was somewhere in a massive crowd of people singing A Spaceman Came Travelling by Chris de Burgh really really loudly and emotionally. Even though it wasn't Christmas.

29.4.11

I dreamt I had to go to one of my uni friends' houses as part of my course. They had a really big, weird family and I hated it there.

28.4.11

I dreamt that I was going to play a nun in the chorus of a play that Rik Mayall was in, so I got all excited about meeting him. We all had to get the bus to the theatre, so I sat behind the driver with a view to seeing anyone who got on the bus as they did so, and was thrilled when Rik chose the seat opposite me. I said 'hi' all nervous-like and he shook my hand and started chatting to me about how he thought we'd met before, and how cool my stripy tights were. It was awesome, but before long he went to sit with someone he knew so he could talk to them.

27.4.11

I was camping somewhere with my family when this frog started crawling over me. When I tried to get it off it turned into a guinea pig, which was apparently something frogs did. I woke up to Amy tapping me, thinking she was the frog/guinea pig.